Hi. How are those New Year’s Resolutions doing?
(pause for gasps, pregnant silence and bad looks)
You made some right? Because you didn’t really listen to me when I said resolutions were a bad idea – that’s understandable because I’m just a disembodied voice and that’s not enough status to prevent you from making yourself feel better.
So since you made them, how are they doing?
“It’s August!” you yell. To which I reply that you’re going to make your 2020 resolutions in five months…
OK, deep breath. If you made resolutions in 2018 for 2019, and didn’t keep them, then one of four things has happened:
- You’ve either abandoned them because that’s a painful, annoying dead end
- You had a modicum of success but just slowed then stopped
- You decided it was just a happy drunken promise without regard for the reality of what it would take to accomplish it
- You decide that you just aren’t capable, and, oh well, that’s life.
Ok then. That’s everyone! Have a good night. (cue bumper music)
You’re still here? And not happy with me? So now what?
Let’s do one of two things:
- Get them done
- Decide that they were a bad idea
That’s it. Keep in mind that you have me at a disadvantage – I can’t use all my powerful tools I built from scratch, examine what’s really going on in your life, and work with you one-on-one. So It’s just a read/listen kind of thing but I’ll do my best. So let’s revisit with solutions:
- You’ve either abandoned them because that’s a painful, annoying dead end
You may have dodged a bullet. This may have been a goal you just arbitrarily set because, hey, why not? Like saying “I’m going to visit the moons of Titan” or “Sure I’ll help you move next year.” If so then just leave it. If this was something you really wanted to do then you hit a wall, and that wall is probably made of Time, Energy and/or Resources.
- You had a modicum of success but just slowed then stopped
Similar to above, it may simply be that you didn’t make the time for it (going to the gym, working on that hobby, etc) and the rest of your schedule said F.U. and it got pushed out. Making the proper time for it can fix that.
- You decided it was just a happy drunken promise without regard for the reality of what it would take to accomplish it
All humor is based on some sort of truth or it’s not funny. The same goes for drunken promises – there was a reason you said that, when your inhibitions were diminished. Is this a secret desire? Don’t you beat yourself up over it.
- You decide that you just aren’t capable, and, oh well, that’s life.
Well, you may not be – see “visiting moons of Titan” above. Or perhaps you are capable and you are being fooled by that thing called reality. Meaning, you need to adjust reality to fit this desire. That reality comes in the form of your time, energy and resources.
Do you see a theme with all of this? You should. It’s those three magic words and they are not “I love you” though I like you an awful lot. Honest.
Time, Energy and Resources – how you adjust them, how you use them, how you let them rule over you.
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Mark Bradford is the author of nine books, both fiction and nonfiction, including the clinical psychologist-endorsed Three Voices as well as the award-winning trilogy The Sword and the Sunflower.
Mark Bradford developed a system to achieve goals, manage your energy and understand and strengthen your path – it’s Alchemy for Life™.
He writes, coaches and speaks on the subject. For more information, tips and tricks, like Mark Bradford on Facebook, follow Mark Bradford on Twitter.
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Articles are posted regularly on AlchemyFor.Life, and LinkedIn.
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